| (no subject) |
[May. 21st, 2005|03:44 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  crazy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Marylin Manson | ] |
OH MY WORD! ME AND HEATHER HAD SHIT LOADS OF FUN, WE DIDNT COME HOME TILL 7:15 THIS MORNING AND I HAVENT SLEPT IN LIKE 42 HOURS BUT ITS ALL GOOD. I KNOW I HAVENT WROTE IN THIS THING IN FOREVER BUT THINGS HAVE BEEN KINDA CRAZY!!!!UM.. LET ME GIVE YOU A FAST UPDATE....ME AND ADAM ARENT TOGETHER ANYMORE, HE DUMPED ME AND I MISS HIM LIKE CRAZY!...I KNOW I WAS DEPRESSED ALL THE TIME BUT HE HELPED ME IN MORE WAYS THEN HE COULD EVER KNOW! I STILL LOVE HIM AND ITS GONNA BE A BITCH GETTING OVER HIM CAUSE WELL IT JUST IS...EVEN THOU HE HAS ANOTHER G/F THAT KINDA PISSES ME OFF BUT THEN AGAIN LIFE ALWAYS FUCKS YOU OVER! ANYWAYS IM LIVIN WITH MY AUNT OUT AT THE HILL AND I GOT ANOTHER CELL NUMBER ITS 940-210-8788 FOR THOSE WHO HAVENT FIGURED OUT THAT MY OLD NUMBER ISNT MINE ANYMORE. AWAYS IVE BEEN WRITTEN SOME MAD POETRY HOPEFULLY I CAN POST HERE PRETTY SOON WHEN I GET THE NET WERE IM LIVING NOW. IM MOVING TO B'TOWN AFTER THIS YEAR, KINDA SUCK BUT THEN AGAIN WHO KNOWS WHAT WILL HAPPEN CAUSE I DONT HAVE JOSH STUCK UP MY ASS ALTHOUGH ITS GONNA BE TOUGH SEEIN ADAM EVERY DAMN DAY KNOW'N I CANT WALK UP AND KISS HIM! ANYWAYS THO!...SHIT I GUESS THATS ABOUT IT! IM OUT... |
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| Back To The Old Ways |
[Apr. 13th, 2005|12:45 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Sarah McLachlan | ] |
Here I go on one of my pitty trips as one sumtimes says...
Of course my life has been shitty latley, I thought I was actually happy there for awhile but then again is anyone actually REALLY happy?...I guess my life is supposed to be a living hell doesnt matter who the fuck is in it. Dad and kristi got into a fight and she kicked him out and he went over to Pete's house and started doin cocaine again, yes my lovely daddy is a drug addact and an acoholic and and abuiser, thats dear ol' dad! Then of course you have my diranged psycho path mother who is addicted to sleeping pills and has every pain killer amaginable. Sometimes i wonder if my parents were suppose to stay together cause hell if they did get back together i would have the perfect fuckin family. O yea i forgot my sister thinks im gonna go to hell cause i hang out with the same ppl she hung out with in high school and i smoke weed, OMG!, heaven forbid that is such a sin! I'm sure those fuckin ministers toke it up everyone now and then, lol....
of course all of yall know i use to cut...until adam came into my life and he helped me a lot on all of this shit, although he doesnt know it, but here recently i feel like its fuckin calling me...sounds weird but you would have to feel that feeling to understand were im commin from. It seems like my whole life is fallin apart, after i have worked so hard to get it to were im happy and i feel like i belong in this shit hole that everyone else calls the world.Like i would usually being fuckin alseep dreamin about sum fucked up thing, but when i get into a depessed mood its like i become an ansominac (how ever you spell that damn word.)
I often wonder if my life would be this fucked up if i was born into a differnt family...is every fuckin teenagers life this fucked up?....What if i fuckin lived in Canada or sum fucked up place like that?....
In closing this update I'm gonna post this poem that i wrote a few days ago...Yes I sumtimes lay in my bed at nite and cry myself to sleep...and yes i beleive and god and the whole nine yards on that whole deal...
-FYI>>>I WRITE ALL MY POEMS, I DO NOT USE OTHER PPL'S MATERIAL!!!!<<[ Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<fyi->') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.] Here I go on one of my pitty trips as one sumtimes says...
Of course my life has been shitty latley, I thought I was actually happy there for awhile but then again is anyone actually REALLY happy?...I guess my life is supposed to be a living hell doesnt matter who the fuck is in it. Dad and kristi got into a fight and she kicked him out and he went over to Pete's house and started doin cocaine again, yes my lovely daddy is a drug addact and an acoholic and and abuiser, thats dear ol' dad! Then of course you have my diranged psycho path mother who is addicted to sleeping pills and has every pain killer amaginable. Sometimes i wonder if my parents were suppose to stay together cause hell if they did get back together i would have the perfect fuckin family. O yea i forgot my sister thinks im gonna go to hell cause i hang out with the same ppl she hung out with in high school and i smoke weed, OMG!, heaven forbid that is such a sin! I'm sure those fuckin ministers toke it up everyone now and then, lol....
of course all of yall know i use to cut...until adam came into my life and he helped me a lot on all of this shit, although he doesnt know it, but here recently i feel like its fuckin calling me...sounds weird but you would have to feel that feeling to understand were im commin from. It seems like my whole life is fallin apart, after i have worked so hard to get it to were im happy and i feel like i belong in this shit hole that everyone else calls the world.Like i would usually being fuckin alseep dreamin about sum fucked up thing, but when i get into a depessed mood its like i become an ansominac (how ever you spell that damn word.)
I often wonder if my life would be this fucked up if i was born into a differnt family...is every fuckin teenagers life this fucked up?....What if i fuckin lived in Canada or sum fucked up place like that?....
In closing this update I'm gonna post this poem that i wrote a few days ago...Yes I sumtimes lay in my bed at nite and cry myself to sleep...and yes i beleive and god and the whole nine yards on that whole deal...
-FYI>>>I WRITE ALL MY POEMS, I DO NOT USE OTHER PPL'S MATERIAL!!!!<<<FYI-
-IF THESE WALLS COULD TALK-
IF THESE WALLS COULD TALK,
YOU'D KNOW MY BODY IS DEAD,
MY MIND HAS BEEN TAKEN OVER,
THAT'S WHY I'M SO SCARED,
I CAN'T CONTROL IT,
ANGER IS MAKING ME BLIND,
I'VE BEEN LEFT HERE ON MY OWN,
CHAINED TO A HATE OF SUM KIND.
IF THESE WALLS COULD TALK.
IF THESE WALLS COULD TALK,
YOU'D KNOW ABOUT MY FEARS,
ABOUT ALL THOSE NITES I SCREAMED FOR HELP,
ABOUT ALL MY FALLEN TEARS.
YOU'D KNOW ABOUT THE DEMONS
HAUNTING ME AT NITE.
YOU'D BE ABLE TO HELP ME
KEEP MY FIRE ALITE,
IF THESE WALLS COULD TALK.
IF THESE WALLS COULD TALK,
THEY WOULD SAY THAT IT'S ALRIGHT,
GOD SENDS HIS ANGELS,
TO LOOK OVER ME AT NITE.
THEY'D ENCOURAGE ME,
SAY THOUGH I AM ALONE,
IT DOESN'T MEAN IM ON MY OWN.
HE WATCHES ME, FROM ABOVE,
AND SHOWERS ME WITH ALL HIS LOVE.
IF ONLY THESE WALLS COULD TALK.
>>HA! if only it were that easy!!<< |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 10th, 2005|09:39 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | bored | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Rob Zombie | ] |
Havent actually WROTE in this thing for a while so i figured i would although i do have two poems im gonna post on here afterwards, lol. As you all know, me and cody were messin around and he is a bastard who hurt me bad, but i moved on as yal know and then i started talkiin to this guy from b-port, Adam Lamb...at first i thought he was a loser (yall remeber me talkin about him from when i was in b-port) but anyways we hung out a few times an all that then we started dating i didnt know if it would get serous or what not but it has and he has made me really happy, even though i get really pissed at times, but he has really changed my life for the better. He is always there for me when i need him and i feel like we have been together for way longer then we actually have. I wrote that poem forever and a day for him and i wrote two more today...
-I Love You-
With my every breath,
With all I have left,
From the deepest depths,
Of my heart, I love you.
With all of my strength,
With ten miles' length,
Every thought I think,
I think that I love you.
For the length of forever,
As long as we're together,
Through good and bad weather,
For always, I love you.
Until the very end of days,
Until God takes my breath away,
Until death separates our ways,
Until then, I love you.
When no one is there,
When you think no one cares,
When love seems too rare,
Remember, I love you.
When everything's gone,
When all has withdrawn,
When hopelessness dawns,
Don't forget, I love you.
When you fall down,
When your dreams come unwound,
When hope can't be found,
Be happy, I love you.
When you make mistakes,
When you're filled with hate,
When you're old and gray,
Even then, I'll love you.
I Love You More
I love you more than life itself
For life in itself is worthless
Without someone with which to share
The beauty of life's purpose.
I love you more than you can know
You've helped more than you can imagine
I once was lonely, now I see
That miracles still happen.
I love you more for who you are
Than what you can or will be
Whenever I am feeling empty
You come along and fill me.
I love you more than happiness
For my happiness comes from you
For so long I waited for someone
And now my wish has come true.
I love you more with each passing day
More than anyone before
But no matter how much you love me
I will always love you more. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 9th, 2005|10:38 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  tired | ] |
-Fade Away -
I want to fly away
I want to die today
I cant take this pain everyday
All people ever do is look stright through me
Like you do
Maybe I should just fade away
Disappear into the darkness today
Kill myself
Bleed to death
It's my dream
Till my death
If I did I'd take a knife
And slice out the pain
Like I do everynight
Feel the realease
Let it flow
Feel the buzz
It's all I will ever know
Truth is I can't live this lie
Pretend I'm happy
When all I want to do is die
So maybe I could just fly away
Disappear into the dark today
Don't miss me if I go
I'll always be with you
Every where you go |
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| Adam... |
[Apr. 6th, 2005|09:18 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | bored | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | gary stewart | ] |
This is prolly one of the few poems that i have written like this so dont judge to harshly jada!..lol but its about Adam.Babe you dont konw how much you mean to me and im so happy that you are in my life now, you have changed it in more ways than one...
-Forever and a day-
I watch you walk towards me,
and teardrops of happiness form in my heart.
And as I see your face,
I know it is finally for real...
Your kiss falls upon me,
soft as the summer's breeze in my hair
Gentle as the words you say to me,
And I know from the moment I look into your eyes,
That forever isn't long enough,
to tell you the love I'd give to you,
Eternity means nothing,
to my encaptured heart.
Make me immortal my darling,
and hold me 'til the universe ends,
until stars and planets explode into obscurity...
So I can taste the beauty of your soul,
the elegance of body,
and sweetness of heart,
that makes you you, and everyone else pale sureality,
So I can hold you, Forever and a day |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 28th, 2005|07:57 pm] |
I wrote this poem when i was thinking about my life and how i see it and how i feel about it....i guess you could say it really isnt a poem just a collection of my thoughts but then again what is really a peom?**
-CONFESSIONS OF A RAG DOLL -
She does it not for happiness but to fill an emptiness inside her heart
Because there's no true way to heal those scars
And not because she is sordid but because this is the only way
Through all the tormoil, she's not the one to blame
This is how she was raised
She was meant to be tossed around, and turned into everyone's slave
She was taught to be so empty, and to dig her own grave
She only knows love as empty hands
Feeding off the bits and pieces like tiny strands
Instead of lingering or dwelling on something lost
She erases the feelings, and hides the broken thoughts
She knows no compassion, because it was never given
No one feels pity, yet they often wonder what world she lives in
Too often her soul starts to burn
It's taken so much pain, and she gives hate in return
Slowly she starts to decay
Pretending not to feel pain
As her heart is torn in two
If she could just be jaded, all this she'd have never gone through
And still this is all she knows
She can't let go
But push it in the back of her mind
Hoping someone will discover her cries
Wishing she belonged
And feelings she gets, knowing they're wrong
Because she's not supposed to feel at all
Because she's only a rag doll |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 21st, 2005|10:37 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | tired | ] |
-OBLIVION-
Feeling all the pain
and becomming so insane
put through so much bane
feelings put in vain
while I try to refrain
everything I disdain
I cant keep from being stained
by the blood that cant substain
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Wanting to be put to demise
or I will begin to demolish everything and everyone
put everyone to abaddon
I seem to be put to oblivion
I begin to be lying in wait
for everyone I hate
becoming blind by a abacinate
these fears I want to abdicate
or at least abirritate
is this my fate
the day I die I await
my life I wish to abate
is today the day I become abdicate
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
I feel so ashamed
I know Im the one to be blamed
nothing will ever be the same
no matter what it seems to claim
my anger rages in a flame
that will not disclaim
even if I been put to shame
your the one to blame
and you hold no fame
your just the same
and anyone who lives in shame
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
Theres so much disgrace
that I must face
feeling misplaced
of the world I cant replace
disappear without a trace
because I cant handle all this pain I embrace
I cant fill in all the space
the people that stay on my case
will all fall down and be out of place
because im gonna leave this world without a trace |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 17th, 2005|02:11 pm] |
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WELL.....I'm not moving right away..cause it would be easier if i waited till this summer...so JADA you can still read my poems...ill have to post one here pretty soon...Juss thought you mite want to know that |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 10th, 2005|07:45 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sad | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Gary Allen | ] |
Hey Yall!...This will prolly be my last update for awhile, i know how sad, lol but for real cause this is my last nite to be at my house on the lake..I'm moving in with my dad in b'town, but ill still be goin to chico schools...But the hard part is, how in the hell do i tell mom that im moving out? I mean im soo sick of her crap, all she does is wine and cries about everything and doesnt give two shits about me. If she needs it she'll get in like the next day but if i was to need sumthin she would put it off and put it off till i bitched long enough and then i would have to listen to her bitch for a week on the matter and i so sick of it. But the main reason why im moving out is because we were riding in the car the other day and she informed me that the only reason she is married to robert is because she couldnt support me by herself..HELLO!!! thats not somthing you tell you kid at all...And i think that this move will help me alot with all of my emotional stuff..i feel that im always depressed when im out here and when im out at the hill or anywhere else i feel fine and all that...its just to much emotional stress, along with mom and roberts constant bitching at one another to me.
But just thought i would inform you on my situation...So jada, i prolly wont be able to post any more poetry for awhile, sorry but i still love ya! Hopefully i'll get internet soon. O and omg, i'm gonna have to give up my phone cause all they have over there is a cell phone, how in the hell im gonna manage without a phone i have no clue.... |
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| WROTE IT TODAY |
[Mar. 9th, 2005|09:10 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  pissed off | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Marylin Manson | ] |
-Complicated Suicide-
Evil watching me
Waiting to take me over
This is my complicated suicide
Sorrowful regrets consumes my soul
Waiting to swallow me whole
This is my complicated suicide
Fearful eyes wont leave me be
Always trying to detroy me
This is my complicated suicide
Dreadful eyes always staring at me
Awaiting the day I fall to my Knees
This is my complicated suicide
My world becomes my fears
And from my eyes I send the tears
This is my complicated suicide
I will fall to the bloody ground
Where I am unforgivinly bound
This is my complicated suicide
I'll take my last breath
And gladly fall to my death
This is my complicated suicide |
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| Wrote this when i was in deep thought... |
[Mar. 6th, 2005|05:22 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | kid rock/ picture | ] |
-Unthinkable-
When life is a mystey and when all else fails
When everythings morose and away your hope sails
The darks pushing in, you're being sliced by nails
Theres no turning back, it's an ungraspible fate.
You're caught in the whrilwind of odium and hate
The water is murky, there's no open gate
The world is gyrating and you can't see straight
There's no turning back, it's an ungraspible fate.
Your life is a burden you're forced to abide
You have nobody, no allies, no friend by your side
You can't get back in no matter how hard you try
No matter how you've pushed or how hard you've cried.
It's Unthinkable. |
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| kind of an update... |
[Mar. 1st, 2005|09:52 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Free Bird | ] |
Well not much has been happening lately..SSDD. This past week was fun and shitty at the same time..i guess the same to say for this two days of this week...
Last week was awesome..some stuff happend that is undiscribable, it was like i was the happiest i have been in a while and then i remembered that it will never be and that im just fooling myself, But what was said seemed so real..all the words wispered..all the kisses...all the laughing...all the hugs and gazing into each others eyes...I woke up wondering if it had happend, then i realized it did and i wanted it all back i would give anything to relive that nite. Friday i went to dad and kristi's house and spent the weekend with them. Jessi (my lil sister) was there this weekend and it was fun..we went bowling, which jessi kicked our asses (she is 11), then we went and i watched her ride horses, it ment alot to her so its kool....Mom is convienced that i smoked weed in her car so im no allowed to take it anymore, o well..ill get that privalige back in time...
This week so far has been ok...i have realized a bunch of shit that i have been needing to realize along ass time ago, so im glad it happend...I have discovered not to tell anyone a god damn thing, kinda crazy but thats how life is. Discovered the truth that i have been searching for for a long time, now im just waitin on the outcome of it, hopefully it will be good, but then again i always get the short end of the stick. I have been writing alot of poerty latley, i havent been posting hardly any cause i was workin on a website so i could just put all my poems on there but i got frustrated with it and said fuck it so i think ima juss stick to posting them on here so with that here is one of them...
-My Favorite Mistake-
If you really don't mean to break my heart
then why do you constantly tear it apart
You say all these things without one ounce of care
but I've done nothing wrong, so it's really unfair
I'll say that I'm sorry for the 50th time
but remind me again, what was my crime?
Oh-yeah, the mistake, when I said that I cared
or the time that I promised I'd always be there
If I knew that loving you could be so wrong
I wouldn't have loved you this much for this long
I wish you could know what I'm trying to say
I wish it could stop, but it won't go away
So, I guess I'll keep doing the bad things I do...
you know, sitting and thinking and waiting for you.
So getting in trouble is the chance that I'll take
because no matter what, you're my favorite mistake.
-I NEVER LET ON/THAT I WAS ON A SINKING SHIP/I NEVER LET ON THAT I WAS DOWN-*SMASHING PUMPKINS* |
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| ITS ONE OF MY FAVORITES! |
[Feb. 28th, 2005|09:54 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  happy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Fuse | ] |
-Crumble-
The cracked foundation of
mitigrating, morose, morbid
morals slip from the grip of
ragged, ripped, real reality.
Seething, seeping, succumbus,
simles drive into the bold, old,
cold, moldering, and smoldering
rotting core of non-existant
existance. Burning it into
nothing more than nothing and
yet at the same time something.
Bring it down and bring it around
found in the distant disarray
of magnetic melodious
mellodramatic sound it slaps
the pretentious pretty face.
what a waste.
Slip and stumble till your
nothing less then a mumble of a
humble. Forget the war there's
always the ear shattering
rumble. Watch as your reality
drains. Watch it crumble. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 23rd, 2005|04:57 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | vermilon PT.2, slipknot | ] |
-DEAD INSIDE-
Days they passed on
Nothing changed but the same death inside
I find me between the suicide and hatred again
Old bruises and new wounds...
Worse than I imagined
I guess I'm not happy
Even though I try
Or I wanna be
How should I survive?
Or how must I lay to die?
Dig my grave deep enough to escape
Bury myself under the earth of death and pain
Forget my hope and salvation
They must have lost their ways
No pill for me to ease this memory
Stained in my heart of wicked past
My loved ones has gone...
Whatelse should I feel now?
Lost within the tortured life
Darkness seems to be overtaking my actions
I sense my movements without motions
I must have been dead...
Or should I?
I'm just dead inside...
beneath the hatred. |
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| ugh!.... |
[Feb. 20th, 2005|05:17 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  awake | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Atreyu | ] |
um...this sux! i have the flu!!! woke up friday morning with a 102 temp, momma wouldnt let me go to school and for once i actually wanted to go cause i had lots of stuff to take care of...BITCH!!umm but like i got my fever down to 99 so i got to go out to the hill and i went shoppin with my DADDY and kristi, spent about 400.00 in about 1 hour, lol it was fun i guess. dad made me eat they are such big nerds we went to chili's and they ordered hamburgers!, how weird is that...THEN saturday i woke up and all that and me and my aunt to go pick out her flowers for her wedding!!...its like a lil over a month away! im kinda excited cause there is gonna be three kegs at the reception..HELL YEA!!then we went and got my nana to go she her daddy in the hospital in fortworth..he is soo funny cause he was answering the tv..but it was sad..anyways i seen Saw, Ray, and King Author(how ever you spell the damn guy's name)...umm saw was soo cheesey i only scramed once, umm Ray was sad but it was a excellent movie and king author was alrite i juss dont know why they must insist on puttin at least one damn sex scene in the movie...i think it juss dulls out the movie i mean who in the hell wants to see two ppl fuckin?!?!?! NOT ME!!!
Talkin to Lisa...found out sum stuff about that guy (ash ya know who it is ) ya know htat stupid bastard who enjoys hurting ppl and using them as he pleases!?!?
And i have come to the concluson of im not gonna even fuckin talk to him i thought that his apolgy was sencere but then again guys are fuckin liars i dont care what anyone says every fuckin guy lies end of story...But the funny thing was thursday he talked to me when SHE wasnt around!! he is a fuckin wanna be player, o well life goes on i guess....i guess im gonna say this now..thanx lisa for what you did, it helped me realize who he really was, your a good friend even tho you may think i hate you at times!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 16th, 2005|09:03 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | crushed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | velvet revolver | ] |
I kant believe this is happening to me, how could i have been so fuckin blind...i never in my life thought this would happen. This is the last time i let any guy into my life. Thats all i have to say.
-This Morbid Feel-
I feel I'm to depressed
To go on with this morbid feel
With all this unbearable pain
That never seems to heal
I just want out
Make my life go away
Becasue I dont think I can live
Day by day by day
So let this blood drip
And let these tears flow
So to my depressed being
I'll finally let go |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 15th, 2005|09:47 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  confused | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | AFI-silver and cold | ] |
Why the hell does my life have to be so damn complicated?...I feel as if im on an emotional roller coaster. Today has most deffiantly been a bad one..at times i was so pissed off i wanted to cry, others i was happy, and most of the time i was juss all out depressed...maybe i have sumthing wrong with me..who knows. Here latley i have been doing things (nothing illegal) and i know i shouldnt be doin them cause it will just hurt me in the long run, but it seems like i cant help it. Like i feel used for sum reason, well i know the reason but like i cant help but go back, its weird and hard to explain. Also found out today that i have sum back stabbin friends you stupid bitches, ya i know you told fuckin shea about new years, i aint stupid shit does get back around to me one way or another... |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 15th, 2005|08:44 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | confused | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | One tree hill | ] |
Teared Shadow
A tear from my shadow,
A cry from my heart.
The sadness is more than you know,
Depressing all my art.
A shout for help to you,
And all goes unheard.
Not knowing what to do,
I do the absurd.
I stab what I once thought wrong,
And enter a new phase.
Death is now my song,
And misery is all it plays.
No longer who I once used to be,
Now I am only a memory.
But who remembers me,
And who even saw my misery?
Will it all end now?
Or am I stuck here in hell? |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 10th, 2005|11:29 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | happy | ] |
The feeling of forgiveness
In my lonely, empty, soul
The feeling of forgiveness
I cannot control
The feeling of forgiveness
In my very teary eyes
The feeling of forgiveness
Torn apart bye lies
The feeling of forgiveness
In my lifeless little mind
The feeling of forgiveness
Where are the answers I need to find |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 9th, 2005|09:13 pm] |
-The Fight-
This lifeless little mind inside my lifeless little head,
Has no feeling what-so-ever as if I'm dead,
I wish to feel that I'm alive,
The track of happiness is towards what I strive,
The cold wind blows against my hair,
As all I can do is sit and stare,
Somehow I manage to dream like before,
I dream of flying, flying high to soar,
I want to do nothing but to go to sleep,
The memories I've had I will then keep,
So I sleep to dream of living life right,
I cannot ever give up on my fight. |
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